Inspirations and Aspirations

I am feeling down in the dumps today. I just feel over-whelmed and exhausted with life. I'm a Muslim girl living in Pakistan that likes to dream big. But that's just it, I just dream big and don't DO anything about it. When I started this blog, I thought: OK, here's a chance to do something that will be known, something different, something related to what I wanna do in life. But it seems like a waste right now, because, I mean look at the page views for my blog. Bleh.
I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
Anything I do seems to be subdued compared to everything going on around me right now. I can't do anything right. I basically struggle with staying positive. A lot. But the thing is, no matter how bad I feel about myself, I always wanna help people in the end more than anything. Because that makes me feel better. I know. Selfish. But what the hey, at least I'm thinking about others. Sometimes, I go crazy because of my conscience. It is literally too much to bear sometimes to always be worrying about things. I just wanna have a good time once in while. And not let things - or people - worry me. Otherwise, I might as well eat myself up. -_-

When we're kids, we wanna grow up. When we're grown up, we wanna be kids.
When we're happy, we (so easily) find excuses to be sad. When we're sad we find excuses to be happy.
When we're alone, we wanna be with people. When we're with people, we wanna be alone.

When we're home, we wanna go out. When we're out, we wanna go home.

When we're away, we miss each other. When we're together, we can't stand each other.
When we're living we wanna die. When we're dying we wanna live.

We, ladies and gentlemen, are Human Beings.

Today, I woke up with the stomach cramps. Well, you can't really say "woke up" when you haven't really gone to sleep. Yes, I was awake the whole night doing what, I will never know...

Why do we like staying awake and 'networking' about? I, for one, will never truly understand. What is so exciting about a night with a coffee/tea mug, your laptop and you tucked in a comfy blanket that sounds so...irresistible and beckoning? I think I know. It's simply a time we can be to ourselves - with other strangers online, of course. Ha.

We like feeling special. So, when we hear it from people we don't know online, we know it's true. It makes us happy to connect with others in any way possible. We find out that we are not alone as weirdos in a big crowd...there are plenty of others *wink*wink* :P

OK...so, here I go. My first ever page of my blogging history.

 I hope I get to do something great in life. I mean, don't we all? Some of us might hide our faces and stay in the shadows, wanna sleep in till late so we can face the day ahead just a little later, and wanna eat till we feel better....But deep down, everyone wants to be heard.

Everyone wants a new start, a new beginning, another chance at life, no matter how worse it gets. Parents screaming at each other, baby crying in the stroller never being taken care of, kids hiding behind their siblings, and you just wishing the ground could open up to swallow you whole.

And suddenly, you don't wanna take part in this thing called Life. You refuse to do it. You refuse to stay. Oh, but you have to. You know that you have to. Because you know if you go away just to make the pain stop, just to stop feeling, period...it will be for yourself. It will be selfish. And someway along the road, you realize you were made for this. You are a fighter. You WILL face it. No matter what, no matter where.

It's not as hard with a little help from a friend ;)